To Obey

 “But Samuel replied: Does the Lord delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices so much as in obeying the Lord? To obey is better than to sacrifice and to heed is better than the fat of rams”

- 1 Samuel 15:22

 

Gracious Lord Jesus, my friend and my King, 

 

Today my heart is again heavy by a rough exchange with a dear friend last night. I feel like I can’t win. I sit here contemplating all the “sacrifices’ I’ve made for this friend. In this moment, I feel the sacrifices should result in gratitude, kindness, and respect. As I’m struggling to process the hurt in this relationship, I’m reminded that if I’m disobedient to what you are asking me to do toward my friend, then all the sacrifices are meaningless. 

 

So, Lord, work me over. Reveal what still needs to change in ME. What needs to be softened? Where have I gone wrong? Where do I need to admit fault and repent? Have I lacked empathy? Have my actions warranted my friend's loss of respect? Truly, I need to hear from you Lord Jesus. Because if I simply allow my friend’s words to land on my heart, uninspected and unfiltered by you, well, it leaves me grieving, angry, confused, resentful, unappreciated, and unwilling to stay in this friendship. None of those feelings line up with your character or word. So I need help. I need your reminder that I’m who you say I am. I need your counsel on what I need to hear and receive. I need your wisdom on what I need to change. I need your guidance and direction on how to help my friend. 

 

Lord, I’m throwing it all on you. I am casting my anxiety on you. I’m desperately seeking your will and your way. Would you guide me today? Would you speak clearly so that my interactions are a blessing to my friend? I need you today, Lord Jesus.

 

 

In Jesus' Name I pray, Amen. 

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