Not Denied

 “Oh, that I might have my request, that God would grant what I hope for, that God would be willing to crush me, to let loose his hand and cut off my life! Then I would still have this consolation—my joy in unrelenting pain—that I had not denied the words of the Holy One.”

 — Job 6:8-10

Gracious Lord Jesus, my friend and my King,

Job is experiencing “unrelenting pain.” I’ve had pain—deep pain—but I don’t know if I can imagine the painful horror of losing all your possessions, all your children, and your health. There are many in this world who would read that last sentence of mine and say, “Yes. That’s me. I’ve lost all.” That is unrelenting pain. The kind of pain that sees no end and simply wishes for God to end it—“that God would be willing to crush me… and cut off my life.” Even in Job’s suicidal state, he says something that stands out in stark contrast to his anguish, “Then I would still have this consolation—my joy in unrelenting pain—that I had not denied the words of the Holy One.”

Lord, even in his pain, Job did not deny or conceal Your Word. Job didn’t discount or discredit the Word of God in an effort to assuage his pain. He even said this was his only joy, to not deny the words of the Holy One. Why is it that when we are at our lowest, experiencing grief, pain, and anguish, that we distance ourselves from You? Why do we stop reading Your love letter to us—the Bible—and choose to sit in our pain alone? Why do we close our ears to Your voice, turn to counterfeit coping mechanisms, and deny the promises You have spoken so clearly? Job said it was his joy in unrelenting pain to not deny Your Word.

Lord Jesus, in the midst of whatever pain I may experience this year, may I not deny Your Word or the promises You have spoken. Even when Heaven feels like brass and my prayers seem to bounce back unanswered, may I hold tightly to Your written Word and Your spoken voice. Lord, Your Word is life and in the midst of unrelenting pain, it is my joy. I can’t deny it.

— In Jesus’ Name I pray, Amen!

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